Keep Your Eyes on Me

Yesterday was a bad day for me. After sitting at my desk, staring at the hypnotic screen, watching the black lines that form shapes to make sense, I threw in the towel.

Nothing was going in. I was screaming at myself (in my head), and feeling so frustrated. Its now exactly 2 weeks to my exams, and there are still alot of things that I should know, that I don't, and it does not help that I am getting a mental block, and that a gnawing pain is starting to form in my head.

Yes, I realised that nothing is going to happen tonight. No more extra facts is going into this brain of mine.

I switched off and asked for God's mercy and grace, for I do not know how I am going to survive this ordeal...and left it at that.

Slmber soon took over and I started to dream...

"I was at a festival of some sort, like a swimming carnival that was held at a beach with the swimming pools nearby. I was suppose to be meeting a friend, and we were going to rent some bicycles to ride along the beach.

My friend finally arrived, and we started our journey, which didn't go very far, for we found ourselves stopping at one of the pools to watch the swimming meet. The race hadn't begun yet, but the competitors, oddly enough, along with some spectators, were already in the pool, lingering at its sides, just waiting for things to start.

I don't know what happened, but the next thing I found myself doing was talking to these people in the pool about God and His faithfulness and the things that He can do for us.

The crowd did not take well to the testimony that I gave at the poolside and began to ignore me.

I then did the unthinkable. I took one step forward and started walking on water!

Yes, I got their attention now.

Even I myself was in sheer disbelief at what I was doing! I started to doubt myself, and felt my legs trembling with each step I took towards the other end of the pool. That's when I felt in my spirit to look up into the sky. It was beautiful. Its was like a picture out of a book. The clouds with the sun's rays piercing it, exuding a heartwarming orange glow.

I felt safe. I heard him say "keep your eyes on me...I will never let you go".

My spirit surged with renewed faith, and I felt my legs strengthen and walk boldly and confidently, while basking in His light, across to the other end of the pool.

Of course, those that witness this miracle questioned me, and doubted God. They thought that it was a gimmick, and that I had cables attached to me or that I had earlier put in some sort of platform to walk on.

I reasoned with them to no avail, and I felt that I needed to walk again, this time however, I got the people in the pool to station themselves on the 4 corners of the pool, as well as some in the middle to witness to themselves that it was all God.

And I walked again"

Alot of doubts have gone through my mind the past few weeks. I'm still wondering how I got this far in medical school, and even how I got into medical school at all!

Studying for the exams have sent my faith in God quivering, and wondering how I will ever make it for my final exams.

God knew my weakness and knew that I needed reminding of what He has done for me, and to remind me, that its not about me. Its about Him.

That I need to keep my eyes on Him and to let Him do the rest.

7:46 AM ·