Memories

Am sitting down at a little pink desk, listening to music, pieces of music that strikes a chord in my heart. The kind of music, where you will find me, in an emotional state. Its difficult to describe the range of emotions that I am feeling right now. Its not a pure entity, a single kind of emotion. Its more like a range of emotions, that could transverse the whole entire spectrum of emotions that a human being can possibly feel. It such a mixture, that it is beginning to tie itself into a knot.

The knot has propelled itself, from being in my belly, to taking residence in my throat.

No. I am not crying.

Walking through the streets of Melbourne today, has brought the hopeless romantic out in me. But then again, the hopeless romantic in me...well I don't think it ever went into hiding in the first place.

Melbourne just has got this romantic feel radiating from her. Maybe its the way the tress are made bare by the fallen leaves and how they are left naked to endure the cold wind. Maybe its the way people take their time, walking along the cobblestoned pathways, soaking in the sun's warmth, especially, when its not always that Melbourne is graced with her rays. Maybe its the people that I am with, and the memories that I am forming everyday, with them...of them.

They have been sweet memories, and they will be sweet memories. I cannot imagine them to be any other way. I don't want them to be any other way.

But also in some way, it may be up to me, to decide how sweet I want my memories to be. Some memories may happen just by chance, gathered into a pretty little box, filled with the days events, special little conversations, precious little hugs, and everything else that brings a smile to my face. But there are also those memories that are formed, because I chose to do something different, or say something different, because I chose to carry out something, without fear or reproach, rejection or even ridicule.

However, those memories at least some of them, that I want to form by choice, have not been made...yet. But I wonder, will I ever be able to carry out those choices to begin with?

It can be scary to attempt at doing something different, doing something that one is totally unfamilar with. But truely, once we can get pass the inital fear, the feeling that one can draw from the event, can be intense or even liberating.

Liberating. Thats for sure. I felt liberated, to finally deciding to do what I have always wanted to do since I came here. Since I laid eyes on that long stretch of street, that became an exotic temptation. I finally took the walk that I have always wanted.

I loved the wide open space of the green field that was shrouded with the sun's beams. I was standing in the middle of this open space, and it felt as I was in the center of the universe, and that God was showering me with love in the form of the sun's heavenly glow.

It was beautiful.

These are the kind of memories that are going to be forever etched within the deepest recesses of my mind. These are the kind of memories, that I get to keep, and those that will keep me company whenever I need a little pick-me-up to remind me that there is alot more to life then whatever situation that I am in at the moment.

Thank you Lord, for giving me life. Life to experience your senseless beauty.

11:34 PM ·